Am I Really Listening?

One of my favorite (deleted) scenes in the great movie Pulp Fiction is when Mia Wallace (Uma Thurman) asks Vince Vega (John Travolta), “Do you listen, or wait to talk?” In a rare moment of introspection, he replies, “I wait to talk, but I’m trying harder to listen.”

In senior living sales, not to mention my friend and family relationships, good listening skills are a necessity. I realized I needed to try harder, however, over lunch once with a friend. We were getting caught up when she was politely interrupted by the server ready to take our order. We made our selections, the server went on his way again, and my friend tried to resume the conversation. “Now where was I?” She queried.

I stared at her awkwardly, wracking my brain. What WAS she saying? But I had nothing. I wasn’t listening attentively enough to help her pick up her train of thought, and it was embarrassing for both of us.

Next time you find your mind wandering when someone else is talking, ask yourself, “If this person was interrupted right now, would I be able to answer the question, ‘Now where was I?’” The simple act of showing you were listening — and you were genuinely interested enough in what was being said that you remember — will be greatly appreciated.